I have learned that relationships grow like people. Sometimes apart and sometimes together. The most difficult thing I ever did was move out of the house where my children and their mother lived when she and I divorced. I missed out on many good-night stories, weekday breakfasts and daily current events. I did it because I needed to do some much needed personal growth and my children deserved to experience a life at home free from the tension of feuding adults.
In my exile, I spent many an hour having self-pity parties; worrying about what they thought of me, what their mother was telling them about me and if they would or could ever love me again. I missed them and tried time and again to bring them closer to me but not always in the right way. Each time i thought i would lose them, I would tighten my grip only to have them run screaming away from me.
And after many years, I came to believe that there was a power greater than me that could restore my relationship with my kids. And if I were to ever be blessed with them in my life again, i would have to release my strangling grip of control. With great trepidation, lots of support and amazing faith, i did just that. I let them go.
Recently, like the winter snow reveals the spring of a new generation, the ice melted and my kids have begun their journey back to my home. The answer was taking the focus off “how to get them to come to me” and turn it to “how to take care of myself”
I stopped worrying about the future and got myself involved in my culinary passion. In the end, it was my passion for culinary that brought my kids back to me. Last night my son and my youngest daughter joined me for a Passover Primer lesson. We made matzoh balls, brisket, flourless chocolate cake and even Raspberry Pate de Fruit! We cooked together, laughed together and ate together. I am so grateful to have them back in my life.
Follow your passion and life gets better! Come cook with me at Camaje! www.camaje.com
Here are some pictures of what we made: